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Thread: Will I be happier living in Miami?

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    Default Will I be happier living in Miami?

    I have always wanted to live in beautiful places. So after college I immediately moved to San Diego. It was a good choice. I've lived here for 12 years, and I am now 36. Still single and enjoying it, own my own business that enables me to live wherever, whenever, as its completely online.

    While the climate is nice in San Diego, I often feel out of place here socially. I have friends, but run into a lot of roadblocks with meeting new people. Lots of snob attitudes in the social scene, and honestly not a lot of attractive girls at all. There is a heavy mexican and asian influence here, so if you like Asian girls, this is your mecca. I am more into south american latina girls and never feel like I will find a wife here. I dont know why. Just can't put my finger on it. I tend to get ignored by 6's and 7's who think they are 10's here ... and it has always bothered me.

    There is also a heavy military influence. I respect and admire our military. But when it comes to the social scene, getting shoulder butted by Navy Seals at a nightclub as a bunch of asian strippers fawn all over them ... its an all too common occurrance in San Diego. Then there is the beach scene, filled with heaviyl tattoo'd, trucker hat wearing, pierced beer drinkers is also just not something I have felt I fit in with.

    Then I visited Miami. I was floored how much fun we had. I met people left and right. I saw girls that were more beautiful than anywhere I've ever been (and I have been to over 13 countries). People did have some attitude, but it didnt bother me at all. I loved the vibe - i loved Mango's with the dancing and latin flair.

    We ended up at Liv. I met a guy who was there with three *stunningly* gorgeous girls. I was focused on one, and he was kind enough to pull me into the VIP area and introduce me. A gorgeous 5ft 9 Cuban girl that was honestly a solid "10". They invited me to an after party and we ended up at some guys mansion. Seriously? When does this happen to me in San Diego? Never. But in Miami, things like this happened often for me. None of these people knew if I had a penny to my name, but they were gorgeous, fun, and welcoming. In one night I've met a new network of friends who own businesses and actually have jobs, in a brand new town I've never been to before. That simply doesn't happen in San Diego. For me.

    Now I am struggling. Trying to decide whether Miami is a better fit for me. I loved the newness, the cleannness, the nice streets, the beaches and the water. The climate this time of year is identical to San Diego. The women are more beautiful than anywhere else. In all these ways, Miami blows San Diego out of the water. I guess that's what this comes down to. Where will I be happier, all around?

    I feel like I am missing the bad. Ignoring the downsides. Only seeing a microcosm. A side of me is stressed and depressed that I may make a move out here and seriously regret it. Reading reviews on Miami are depressing. So many negative things said by the locals.

    Any input?
    Last edited by MiamiBurger; 11-16-2010 at 06:01 PM.

  2. #2
    Preferred Member laurab's Avatar
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    "fart brown sand covered in dirty seaweed and year round cold water. With a bunch of "Cholo" mexicans in wifebeaters blasting "Sublime" with white socks pulled up to their knees BBQ'ing and whistling at your girl."

    God I miss California sometimes.

    Anyways, it sounds like you had a typical visit to Miami, specifically South Beach. I think living here for a while wouldn't do you any harm. Have fun, date it up, party, do your thing. Then when it gets old, or when you meet that wifey you are looking for then move on up to Ft. Lauderdale or back west. If you can work wherever you have internet access, don't have to worry about money, etc then why not?

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    Default Re: Hi Matt - and everyone. Some questions

    Haha ... you quoted the part I removed from my post. Haha ....

    I guess its just hard. Its not like when I checked out Phoenix for 6 months. Hopped in my car, threw my stuff in storage, and rented a nice condo ... only a 5 hour drive away. Or the time I wanted to see what it would be like to live in Vegas. Another 5 hour drive, hopped in my car. ... Its all nearby. Miami? Huge process. Huge effort. Putting a lot of eggs in the basket I guess. And its always sad to leave a place you've called home for 12 years.

    I guess the idea is to find an apartment rental and see if the city grows on me. I take it you used to live in California? I sure could use some input from people who have lived in both locations. That would be the holy grail of advice right now for me...

    Kevin

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    Senior Member Blackford Oakes's Avatar
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    Default Re: Hi Matt - and everyone. Some questions

    Strange to hear that especially being that San Diego right now is the most deserible place to live. I always been partial to the northern areas like La Jolla or the southern part of Orange County.

    Whatever you do, don't base it on an impulse from one night in Miami. That experience might not even reproduce again in ten years.

    I traveled quite a bit, and Brazil seemed to be the most impartial place I've known. I'm a SoCal native and I don't find the people in Miami more approachable.

    By any chance are you in Chula Vista ?

    Good Luck with wahtever you decide.

    By the way, Gus is from San Diego and might have some valuable input for you.

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    Mmm. Well, there is no reason you can't live like that in South Beach. Plenty of people do. Sungal started like that, partying like a rock star every night, in Liv and other places, meeting fun people.

    But... the one thing you have not mentioned is your income. You are going to need a job here. I mean, most people on the beach have two jobs. Everyone I know does. Heck, Matt Meltzer has about 5. Point is, if you are going to live that lifestyle, you are going to need the means to support it. Especially if you want to meet 'solid 10s' in Liv. Cos while none of them knew if you had a penny to your name that particular night, trust me, that's all most girls here care about.

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    Editor Christy's Avatar
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    Hi MiamiBurger,

    Interesting description of San Diego. I've never been but pictured it more of a laid-back surfer town.

    Why not just move to Miami for one year and try it? Put all your stuff in storage in CA, and come here and get a furnished place. You could even do a 6 month lease. If you have a thing for Latin girls then this is the place for you. You'll encounter a few negatives but if you find your dream girlfriend then I think it's worth it. Finding a decent apartment is key so I'd come to Miami for at least one week to do a City Tour, and look at apartments in different neighborhoods. I think you'd like Brickell or South Beach.

    Were you at LIV on a Sat night when you went to that party?

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    Default Re: Will I be happier living in Miami?

    [edited 90% of my post as it was just rambling thoughts on San Diego]

    Christy -

    Yes Saturday night. I hope I didn't give anyone's identity away in my description. They've all turned out to be really cool people and I think will be good friends.

    Miami struck me as a place that is beautiful, tropical, and clean with the option to settle down in a beautiful home one day as well. San Diego doesn't have that option honestly. less than 10% of people can afford homes here. Even though I can - the quality of home i would get for the $ i would dish out is almost laughable. Miami struck me as a slightly cheaper place (especially inland) with beautiful houses that are more affordable in nice neighborhoods with schools. maybe thats Ft Lauderdale moreso ... Ill have to take some tours and find out what is there. In San Diego i absolutely do not see the option to raise kids here, or settle down. Its a "singles" town from top to bottom in my opinion, even though I know there are tens of thousands of single family residences here. Maybe my viewpoint is just skewed. Ill have to come out there and see what Miami has rather than sit on the internet in San Diego and post on discussion forums.

    But... the one thing you have not mentioned is your income. You are going to need a job here. I mean, most people on the beach have two jobs
    I own my business and can work from anywhere, so I wont need to get a job. My current rent is about $3500 a month for a downtown SD condo. Lease isn't up until July. I've got about $2000 of "extra" that could go towards a Miami place, but I wouldn't have my car there. I'd probably have to rent one. Thats easily another $2000. Ill figure something out. If I had a friend with an extra bedroom I could crash in for a few weeks, that would be outstanding.
    Last edited by MiamiBurger; 11-17-2010 at 03:17 PM.

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    Despite the supposed high cost of living that many of the locals whine about $3500 can you a ton here in Miami. You can get a good two bedroom for $1600 to $2000.

    And I always disagree with people on your experience. I encourage taking chances and trying new things. I do not think your experience at LIV was unique. I have found Miami to be exactly like that for 8 years running, now. People are fun and friendly and it is incredibly easy to meet new people.

    When we first moved here, I had a network of dozens of friends within the first few months.

    Of course, you have a good start right here on MB411. Though I had lived in Miami for a while before I found this site, I've met many cool people on it.

    Plus, if you already met some people and are still in touch with them, that is another bonus.

    My suggestion is this: you have until July when your lease is up. Set up a week-long vacation here in Miami. Rent a short-term condo, so you have your own place, with a kitchen and whatnot. Then, just check it out. Roam the cities. Check the nightlife. See some culture. Meet some people. If, after that, you still love it, go for it. If your job really does afford you the ability to live anywhere, you are a fool to stay somewhere you don't like.

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    Senior Member Doug's Avatar
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    I wrote an article comparing these two cities last year -- and actually ended up moving to San Diego. I agree about San Diego's social challenges, but now that I'm not in my 20s anymore, I didn't do any better in Miami on that front. But I liked the climate better in CA, as well as the coffee house scene. I also found San Diego more down to earth, with a better neighborhood feel. However, I ended up getting a dud of an apartment in North Park, San Diego and had to move. Every apartment I looked at in my price range anywhere in the city was disappointing, although the housing stock in that range would be comparable to what you'd find in Miami (although Miami does have more skyrise type places).

    San Diego felt more All-American, whereas Miami is like a film noir movie. That's a great quality for an escape, but not necessarily so much so when dealing with the every day aspects of living somewhere. California feels a lot more progressive in certain areas, like medical marijuana and consumer rights, low-income programs for utilities, etc.

    There is also a much larger gap between salary and cost-of-living in Miami. I like the water in Miami more, but feel that the beach areas have been horribly overbuilt; I enjoyed the height restrictions on the buildings in San Diego in the beach areas.

    So, when I couldn't afford a decent place to live in San Diego, I decided on Palm Springs, and so far I'm very happy here. For $865 I have a spacious 2 bd apartment with a private yard. There's a good mix of people coming in from LA and elsewhere every weekend, interesting architecture, stunning natural beauty, and some great local restaurants and galleries. However, it doesn't have the party scene and all the 10's that you like, so I don't think you would like it as much. I've done all that, though, and am ready to live a simpler life.

    I feel it's a great benefit to experience life in as many different places as possible. It expands the mind and just adds to the palette of culture and life experience. So you can't go wrong by giving it a try in Miami, even if you should later get tired of it!

    Here's my article:
    Comparing San Diego to Miami - Miami Beach 411

    Let us know where you end up!
    Last edited by Doug; 11-17-2010 at 11:39 PM.

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    Default Re: Will I be happier living in Miami?

    I would rather live in Miami than San Diego. Miami has more tropical, warmer weather, and it's way cheaper. Less snobby stuck up people. At least for me though, my vacations were better than living here (duh). I'm stuck inside my office all day when there's beautiful tropical weather outside, and I don't get to enjoy it!

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    Senior Member Doug's Avatar
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    I actually found San Diego less stuck up than Miami. People were very friendly in San Diego, much less confrontational than Miami, more mellow, more polite. But it was harder to get beyond that. On the east coast, people tend to have a more abrasive veneer, but once you get past that -- if you get past that -- they can be friends for life.

    The weather in Miami in the winter is actually very similar to the weather in San Diego in the summer!

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    Senior Member Blackford Oakes's Avatar
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    Ditto that Doug.

    So Cal is too laid back to be worried about being stuck up. Different game and mentality. Now of course, you've got the exceptions.

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    Senior Member Doug's Avatar
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    Oh sure, there's the posers in Hollywood and the old money of La Jolla, but people there seem more karma conscious. If these places were drugs, Southern California would be marijuana and South Florida would be cocaine.

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    I agree. California is much more laid back than Miami. California is west coast and Miami is east coast.

    There's a world of cultural differences between the coasts.

    I like your analogy about Southern California being marijuana and Miami being cocaine, but I think in this day and age, it's a little passe.

    These days, Southern California is marijuana and Miami is alcohol.

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    Senior Member Doug's Avatar
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    Okay, maybe Absinthe...

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    Editor Carlos Miller's Avatar
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    Miami is just a drinking culture in general while Southern Cal is a pot-smoking culture. Everything closes so early out there and everything is so spread apart, that people just tend to hang out in houses and smoke up.

    Here, we would find that boring. We like to drink. And we like to drink until the early hours.

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    Senior Member Blackford Oakes's Avatar
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    Default Re: Will I be happIier living in Miami?

    Quote Originally Posted by Doug View Post
    Oh sure, there's the posers in Hollywood and the old money of La Jolla, but people there seem more karma conscious. If these places were drugs, Southern California would be marijuana and South Florida would be cocaine.
    The biggest trip is everyone there has a SAG Card. Nothing personal with you Doug as I know you have one and you're a genuine dude, but nobody I grew up with has one and maybe two or three work in the industry. I find it amazing I was impervious to that crap, living in the shadows of all those studios.

    I get the jest of miamiburgers take on San Diego. It's a nice city, but I found it boring. Probably something accenctuated by a couple of nights in SoBe.

    He might be happier here, but it's a lot different if you have to wake up to an alarm clock than spending days and nights of leisure.

    It's a tough call and I hope he plays it right.

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    Senior Member Doug's Avatar
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    I was just telling someone that SAG card gets me half off at Dennys on my birthday. In other words, it's not really helping much these days.

    I think the nightlife is much easier to sustain if you're in vacation mode than when you're in regular mode. For one, going out in Miami can be incredibly expensive. I couldn't imagine a local doing bottle service every weekend. And those $17 cocktails aren't an every day experience. When you have to make a living and be responsible, those parties have to become an every once in a while thing. Also, tourists are more appealing to locals because of their novelty. If I visit my hometown, I have the best time for the week I'm there, because I'm in vacation mode and more interesting to be around. I think, I should move back here! But then when you do, and the daily routine starts to replace the euphoria, it's not nearly as exciting anymore...

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    Senior Member FredTheCatTravels's Avatar
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    Default Re: Will I be happier living in Miami?

    I just wanted to add that you may want to spend the hottest month of the year in Miami to find out whether or not you can take the weather on a permanent basis.

    Good luck!
    Gus likes this.

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    Editor Matt Meltzer's Avatar
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    Ok, first you have some SERIOUS misconceptions about Miami.

    First, it is NOT clean. I mean, it may be the dirtiest city in Florida insofar as litter, smells, etc. That may also come with being the largest city. But it is NOT clean.

    Second, inland Miami is in no way, shape or form what you experienced on your trip here. That rant I saw you edited about the Mexicans in San Diego? That's ALL of Miami, guy. There's no White section here, escept for maybe Pinecrest. And you don't wanna live in Pinecrest. Seriously, if you do not like Hispanic Trash, inland Miami is NOT for you. There are a good number of classy, intelligent Hispanics here with a lot of money and culture. But they are VASTLY outnumbered by the trashy ones. Go to 8th Street beach on a weekend and you'll see what Miami is really about.

    Third, this is even more of a singles city than San Diego. Raising kids here would be a TERRIBLE idea. Most kids I know who grew up here were into at least weed by 13, most having sex by 15. Petty theft crimes, also very common among my friends who grew up here. In an upper middle class White area (Pinecrest). Point being, if you are looking for somewhere conducive to raising a family, forget South Florida.

    You had a nice vacation. And that's great. But living here is 180 degrees from what visiting here is. Seriously, if the relatively-small Hispanic population in San Diego gets to you, Miami will make you insane. 2/3 Latin, guy. Two-Thirds. You may want to come out and try it, but just be forewarned your experience on vacation was NOTHING like what living here will be.

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